Courts, Courtship & Courtiers
by Offin
Summary: Yuuri (accidentally) decrees by law that Conrad date people other than himself, and regrets it deeply. (ConYuu Conrad x Yuuri Multi-chapter series)


It had all started with a question, one Yuuri regretted deeply.

 _"Hey Conrad, why don't you have a girlfriend?"_

Why in the seven layers of Hell did he ask Conrad such a personal question in the first place? What had he expected his godfather to say to that?

 _"I haven't the time for such things, your majesty."_ the man cheerfully replied.

Yuuri should have just _let it go._ You don't have the time? Cool. Let's talk about the weather, baseball, food, _anything._

But what did he do?

 _"That won't do!"_ he had cried, his justice senses tingling, _"You need to have time for your own life, too!"_

 _"But Yuuri, this is my life-"_

Yuuri specifically remembered ignoring Conrad's attempt to save them both.

 _"I'll talk to Gwendal. I need to make sure you have enough time to d-date people, y-you know... if you want to..."_

Again, Yuuri should have let it go, but being stubborn as he was, he decided to talk to Gwendal about it.

He literally asked Gwendal to give Conrad more time to date people.

He was rewarded with an extremely awkward conversation in which his senior Chief of State grumbled:

 _"You want me to give Conrad time... so he can court women?"_

 _"Er... Or m-men or w-whoever..."_

 _"Do **you** want to court him?"_

 _"W-what!? No! J-just uhh- I want him to f-feel like he has the time to, i-if he wants to...?"_

Gwendal must have known, he had to of known because he replied:

 _"I can only allow Conrart time to court if he spends that time actually courting."_ this was true, there were laws and ways for a senior officer to take time off for personal matters. However, what Yuuri didn't know was Gwendal was giving him an opt-out, a way to back down and escape this ridiculous proposal. Thinking back on it, that phrase was the point of no return where he could have gave up, thanked Gwendal for his time and dropped the issue altogether.

Except... he didn't.

 _"Alright!"_ He had cheered, _"Make it happen!"_

What was he _thinking?_

That one stupid cheerful reply landed Yuuri (and Conrad) in the position they were in now.

Conrad had been granted less work- under the mandatory condition that he court with the intent of 'furthering his bloodline.' Apparently the king could decree that any member of the 10 aristocrats or of his subordinates be forced to take time off to marry or have children for the betterment of the country.

Not knowing this, Yuuri called into play an ancient shit storm- where whoever the Maoh cursed with this decree would be forced to accept suitors and spend time courting them in hopes to bolster affection between the victim and their match.

Yuuri literally **decreed by law** that Conrad date people.

He literally decreed that the crush of his life, his beautiful knight be forced to date people while Yuuri couldn't take it back or even attend the courting sessions because he **A.)** wasn't single by the courts ruling thanks to his farce engagement and **B.)** was the Maoh and had important kingly things to do such as wallow in misery.

Which was what he was currently doing right now- wallowing in misery as Conrad sat across from him, surrounded by family and friends and his current match- a tan skinned large breasted woman with white hair and grey eyes.

She was very beautiful, Yuuri admitted to himself with despair.

Apparently her country was in turmoil, on the brink of civil war. She was the head princess who was sent off to be wed to a foreign suitor who could grant her safety and a similar life of luxury. Conrad fit the bill and so during the first 'courting session' they were introduced and told the 'rules' of their courtship and then left to their own devices.

She could come and go as she pleased but Conrad... thanks to Yuuri's stupidity and the laws put into place- couldn't leave her side until she dismissed him.

So Conrad sat at the dinner table, a content smile on his face as he ate Shin Makoku's equivalent of mashed potatoes and helped translate a conversation between his new 'sweetheart' and his mother.

 _"It's very convenient your son knows my language."_ Conrad translated to his mother on the princess's behalf.

"I know!" Celi laughed, patting Conrad's hand. "He knows lots of languages, but I didn't know he spoke yours!" the princess spoke to Conrad once more and he laughed heartily before translating: _"In my country a man who knows many languages knows many prostitutes."_

The table fell silent as Conrad continued to eat like nothing at all was wrong.

"Well..." Celi said, at a loss for words and the woman curled her hand around Conrad's arm.

Yuuri flinched when his shin was suddenly kicked beneath the table. "Ow, Wolf- stop it." he grumbled to the blonde next to him.

"What? I didn't even touch you, louse!" the angelic voice of his fiance pierced his ears.

 _"Shibuya,"_ it was Ken who kicked him as he made a point to do it second time. _"What?"_ Yuuri hiss-whispered to his friend who leaned close to his ear.

 _"You keep staring Lord Weller down, it's super obvious so tone it down..."_

"I am?" he murmured, his eyebrows flying up into his hairline. "I-I didn't notice..."

Wolfram cleared his throat, causing Yuuri to look over and make eye contact with him. Once their eyes met, the blonde menacingly stabbed a piece of meat with his spork.

 _'S-scary!'_ Yuuri thought; he could practically see the waves of dark energy and anger rolling off of Wolfram as the conversation around the table continued on without them.

 _"He will provide adequate children."_ Conrad said, trying his hardest not to laugh as he translated the princess's words once more.

"C-CHILDREN!?" Yuuri shrieked upon overhearing their conversation. "H-HOW!? W-when!?"

Conrad couldn't help but laugh then as the woman next to him gave Yuuri a glare.

"She believes we'll be married by the end of this month." Conrad explained.

"B-but-" Yuuri felt like the world was crashing down upon him- _CONRAD WAS GETTING MARRIED!?_ He'd only been paired with this woman mere days ago!

Conrad's eyes sparkled as he watched Yuuri gape like a fish before looking further down the table at Gwendal. His older brother looked thoroughly unamused as he slowly swirled his wine. His indigo eyes told Conrad he wasn't happy about any of this.

Conrad met his stony stare with a boyish grin.

"Ohhh~ It'll be so lovely! I'm so glad one of my sons is finally getting married!" Celi sighed dreamily.

"Mother!" Wolfram snapped, "You can't expect him to marry this woman! She's a stranger!"

Yuuri gave Wolfram a thankful look- at least someone had their head on straight.

"Oh?" Celi's eyes grew wide as she eyed her youngest son. "I remember you saying something similar- yet more... ill intended about Yuuri-heika not too many years ago... Now you couldn't be happier! Right Wolfie?" Celi smiled at her youngest.

"T-that's different!" Wolfram huffed, slamming his fist upon the table.

"Ehh, not really. From what I've heard you were forced into an engagement by the Maoh." Ken added with a smile. "Lord Weller was matched with.. ahh what is her name again?"

 _"Valhalla'kara."_ Conrad said effortlessly. "You may call her Val."

 _ **"Ah'kara ranasha^ kabana-lara."**_ Val said sharply, glaring at Conrad. This caused Conrad to raise his eyebrows a bit.

"What?" Yuuri asked.

"She said it's apparently **not** alright to call her Val. I didn't know you knew any _Shinmajin..._ " Conrad mused.

"What in the world am I suppose to call her then?" Yuuri grumbled. "I can't even pronounce Conrad's name!"

 _"Annyyyways,"_ Ken interrupted, "As I was saying. Lord Weller and the princess were matched due to their status. They weren't forced into an engagement like Lord Bielefeld."

"C-Conrad?" Yuuri asked, not sure if he wanted to hear the answer to his next question. "Did you propose to V-Vallaha..ah...?" he finished pathetically.

"Of course, your Majesty." Conrad smiled softly.

Yuuri felt the world tilt violently, his hearing began to go mute as his vision swam.

Did he accidentally drink wine?

Just last week he'd been building up the courage to end his farce engagement and tell Conrad his true feelings.

Just last week he'd been imagining a future with Conrad- a romantic one.

 _"Yuuri!"_

 **THUD**

Apparently this information was too much for Yuuri- the shock of it all causing him to faint right in his seat.

* * *

 _Hello everyone!_

 _Sorry about the Hiatus, life happens etc. etc. I do plan on continuing my other fics! Slowly but surely... Thank you for being patient with me! Hope everyone has an awesome holiday season and a Happy Thanksgiving to those of you in the US!_


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